Do you know how long love lasts?

Falling in love is a state of instant, passionate, overflowing, uncontrollable, and irrational happiness that connects us with a feeling of profound completeness. Freud said it is a psychotic state of personality, and he was right: there is nothing more similar to a madman than a lover. That person is not seeing reality but idealizes it. They do not see the other in their entirety; rather, the other is a screen on which they project their idealized aspects. This state is unsustainable over time. It can last hours, days, or even months. It is precisely when we begin to know the other person that the first disillusionments arise, leading to a more real encounter, one that accepts the other in their entirety, with their flaws and virtues. From that moment, we can begin to build a relationship, and falling in love is replaced, in some cases, by love. Falling in Love vs. Love Love is the state in which we choose our partner without wanting to change them and seek to build a path together from there. It can be more pleasurable than falling in love, but it can never compete in terms of intensity. Falling in love is always more intense. When we are in love, we are attracted to the similarities. In contrast, love also brings differences. Fortunately, in relationships, we can move from falling in love to love and from love to falling in love. We can love but also fall in love many times with the same person. It might even be necessary to sustain a relationship that makes us happy. We could think that falling in love is like happiness; we experience it in moments. The Chemistry of Love Today we know that everything that happens to us has its physical correlate: when we are scared, we tremble; when we are excited, we get goosebumps; with anxiety, our heart races; and when we are in love, we can feel all these things… and some more. The main culprit for everything that happens to us when we are in love is dopamine, a neurotransmitter that increases in this state and produces pleasurable, exciting symptoms that have the power to detach us from reality. But it is not alone, as norepinephrine also plays a role, focusing our attention on an object, specifically our object of love. All of this is compounded by a drop in serotonin, which causes obsessive thoughts about our love to arise. Now, with this explosive cocktail, we can no longer avoid being in love. Tips for the Infatuated Do not make major decisions regarding your partner when you are in love. Remember that you are not in your right mind! Enjoy, but be prepared for when the first differences appear. Respect your limits and those of the other. Clear boundaries help sustain this state. The key to falling in love again is to maintain personal spaces so you don't stop surprising the other. Be careful not to fall into routine: it is the number one enemy of falling in love.