Can love be demonstrated through the food choices one makes? In reality, love, like water, seeks an outlet through any crack. Food is just one form, as are words, a walk, a decision, a meeting. We would tell a couple that love is expressed through details, through pampering. The same goes for self-love. But what is self-love, and what is the best way to manifest it, specifically in terms of food?

Some might argue that it is simply fulfilling the body's cravings. And sure, once in a while, it can be. An occasional and conscious treat is undoubtedly a sign of flexibility, of allowing ourselves to stop being overly demanding at every moment. But one must distinguish between an ego's whim and a real longing: one does not live on salads any more than on cake.

Love begins with attention. You cannot love what you do not know. The body will tell us about hunger, about the physiological needs of the organism. We must start with a small scan: "We lack vitamin C!", perhaps our cells might express. And if we really listened to the deep cravings of the body, we would most likely ask for a lime soup, creamy spinach, or a citrus and pepper salad.

Another way to pay attention to the body is to know what sits well with us, what gives our insides a kick, what feels heavy. And there is no better way to get to know oneself than to give full attention before, during, and after eating. We could even keep a food diary to record how a certain preparation or ingredient made us feel.

Love is expressed through communication. In this case, when we can listen to the body, it communicates through sensations: is it hungry or thirsty? Does it feel pain in the center of the chest, is it stressed? When we are already eating, we should investigate how the body feels with that food. Is my belly inflating? Is the heat rising and making me sweat? And during the after-meal period, it would be important to check on digestion, the energy state left by the chosen menu. Was it restorative? Did it feel like a bucket of water? Did it leave us feeling sad?

Attention can go beyond the body itself. It could lead us to register the emotions we have before sitting down at the table. It would be worth asking ourselves how we arrived. Am I sad, tired, euphoric? How will this influence my food choices? Anxiety might lead me to eat more, and sadness to eat less. Can I make decisions above these emotions? If it cannot or is not wanted, with awareness, the act of love will represent being flexible with oneself. Stopping the demonization of ingredients or preparations and enjoying them with moderation and self-care.

The sensations of the body and emotions do not stand alone. The mind will throw thoughts, beliefs, or judgments about certain foods that will make us choose one food over another fundamentally. But we must be aware of this as well. If, as children, we were taught that “there is no food without meat,” that “vegetables are for cows,” we will surely ask for something devoid of freshness and greenness. If our way of finding joy has been through fried food, it is likely that on a cloudy day, we will choose something drenched in fat. There lie the traps of thoughts that catch us off guard when we do not self-examine. Will eating something fried really make me happier? Are my beliefs about food true? The only answer lies within the body. Review the before, during, and after the meal. And if, after the cravings, guilt lingers, remember that guilt is one of love's enemies. The lie is undoubtedly another worse one.

Just as real love is active and not passive, after listening to the body + sensations + mind, we will have more elements to make better decisions. And of course, do not forget that we must be observant of the outside world so that our decisions are not someone else's truth. The tasting of food may be a social and collective matter, even cultural and now digital, however, eating is an individual act that expresses who we are and how much we love ourselves. No one can force you to eat something you do not need, something you no longer want. Perhaps when we were young, we could not make decisions about what would enter our temple. Now it is part of the journey of those who want to live in consciousness and love.

The quality of our decisions has to do with how much we value ourselves and what we value. If one is conscious, there are no bad decisions. There are simply acts of truth, acts of listening, or acts of compassion – where a good pastry fits – that must be balanced with good foods – fresh, unprocessed – for the optimal preservation of the organism. And yes, do not forget that the optimal preservation of the being is the most essential act of love.

Love leaves us sensations of well-being, and if we reflect, well-being is the closest thing to happiness. What a great gift it is to feel satisfied and fulfilled when finishing our plate; happy and guilt-free; recharged with energy. Revitalized, whether it’s morning or night; relaxed and at peace, if it's almost bedtime. States of full awareness and connection only by staying "awake" and attentive while eating.

How to start listening to ourselves? Love asks for attention, or at least to avoid distractions, so, dear Netflix series: we love you, just as we love you, Alfaguara Prize books, TikTok influencers, or the chicken cooking video from Kiwilimón on Facebook. At mealtime, the best is to enjoy harmony, full attention, good conversation, and good energy that does not spoil our food choices. Other ways to love oneself through food are to be grateful for what is in front of us, to thank those who put that deliciousness on our plate, to thank the body for its effort in taking care of us and processing everything kindly.

It is possible to love oneself through food, just as it is to express love to others with it: offering our family dishes that, besides being vigorously seasoned, carefully flavored, are full of attention to detail, to the ingredients, so that they leave them with sensations of well-being.

Awakening the body's wisdom takes time. The energy that runs this year is one of recovery, and what better way to embrace it than by reclaiming our power and taking responsibility for self-care, for the love we give ourselves. 2023, here we go.